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There isn't enough lube in the world for this mission.

Researching slash writing for the spies, Johnny Damocles and Teiresias Jones. Typically, this is a rather involved operation, what with having to find the horniest music (aah) and ridiculously superficial magazine spreads (ooh) full of colour but very little meaning.

We're not even on page 2 of this thing and they're already getting naked after I've spent whole paragraphs describing their clothing choices.

Prada definitely needs to make corsets.

The psychology of this! Having to delve into British pop music goups and fetish pornography, Victorian photography, and expensive architecture. Not to mention the mildly offensive bits. It's like being Twiggy.

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