"the quiet world", by jeffrey mcdaniel
in an effort to get people to look
into each other's eyes more,
the government has decided to allot
each person exactly one hundred
and sixty-seven words, per day.
when the phone rings, i put it
to my ear without saying hello.
in the restaurant, i point
at chicken noodle soup. i am
adjusting well to the new way.
late at night, i call my long-
distance lover and proudly say:
"i only used fifty-nine today.
i saved the rest for you."
when she doesn't respond, i know
she's used up all her words,
so i slowly whisper i love you,
thirty-two and a third times.
after that, we just sit on the line
and listen to each other breathe.
I counted. The poem is only 120 words. So, it could, in fact, be more perfect. and by that I mean clever.
Posted by: caroline at January 21, 2006 2:43 PMBut if it was all the words he could use, he wouldn't have any to, you know, say some private things. Which seems to be part of the point.
120 + 059 (The ones he used today) = 179...
One word off. Hmm. Guess it counts to always have one in reserve.
Posted by: ben at January 22, 2006 8:30 PMNo, wait, he's actually over his limit. I can do math! And hold reading comprehension in my head. I am lame.
Hrm. Damn poets. Is it so much to ask for perfection?
Posted by: ben at January 22, 2006 8:31 PMBtw, this reminds me of "Poem," by Leonard Cohen:
I heard of a man
who says words so beautifully
that if he only speaks their name
women give themselves to him.
If I am dumb beside your body
while silence blossoms like tumors on our lips.
it is because I hear a man climb stairs and clear his throat outside the door.
--
It's one of the poems I have memorized, because, man, damn..
Posted by: ben at January 22, 2006 8:33 PMI love you.
quite possibly because these responses remind me of the type of thing I would do, so what I'm really saying is I love myself. and: let's not mess with that.
xoxox