1. I'm not, "the son." I am a real person with a real name. Take some time and learn my name. I don't care why you're in my house at eight in the morning. You don't get to dismiss me as "the son". Fuck you nurse-maid.
2. I realize what a terrible inconvenience I'm being, by waiting for the bus. Perhaps I am in your way. Perhaps you could say, "excuse me" or something polite, rather than push me into the street. Fuck you pedestrian.
3. As if waiting for the bus wasn't too much, I had the audacity to actually get on the bus today. I guess I should realize just how much a favor you're doing, pushing the button to open the door. Maybe you'd have a better day if you didn't grunt at people as they said thank you. Fuck you bus driver.
4. Human interaction can be difficult, yes. I often misunderstand "dark coffee please" for someone yelling "get me a fucking bagel" early in the morning. Did you think I was going to stuff the bagel into the coffee cup I brought with me? At least you made me believe it was my fault that you're an idiot. Fuck you bagel-bitch.
5. I'm there (voluntarily) five hours before I need to be, to help you with something I left more than two years ago. I'm glad that I got mocked, it reminded me of my place in the world. Fuck you prof.
6. Calculus. Fuck you Calculus.
7. Forest Gump is an allegory for the gay rights movement. No, its a love story. No, its crap. Fuck you Forest, and your stupid accent too.
I feel better now. Was that over the top? I can't really tell.
I've decided to take the night off from homework and watch trashy tv and eat. I'm going to eat the first thing I see in the fridge that looks appetizing. Then I'll drink some leftover wine. Then I'll eat some more. Then I'll commiserate the homework I'm not handing in tomorrow. Then more eating.
I should make a cake. How was your day?
Comments (6)
Ahem.
"Fuck you, Clown!"
Say it with me now.
Posted by ben | November 24, 2004 8:42 PM
Posted on November 24, 2004 20:42
Let me throw a few in as well - fuck you Shannon, fuck you my parents, fuck you work (bosses and coworkers) and fuck all the men in this city who won't give me a second look because I'm a big girl. Make that a double fuck you.
Cheers honey - drink that wine. I'm doing the same thing here.
Posted by dan | November 24, 2004 9:43 PM
Posted on November 24, 2004 21:43
You men and your wine. Me and my not having any wine that I can drink right now and needing to get to fucking bed so I can get up in mere hours to give bloody presentations and my god why am I still awake?
Posted by ben | November 25, 2004 1:08 AM
Posted on November 25, 2004 01:08
Lol - we are a cheerful bunch of buggers aren't we?
Posted by dan | November 25, 2004 2:14 AM
Posted on November 25, 2004 02:14
I'd like to send a hearty Fuck You out to someone.
I can't choose who though. I'm not so angry at anyone. I would like to play along though, so I'll say fuck you to the guy who went on a coffee date with me and then decided that he was uninterested, and said so almost too nicely.
Fuck nice.
Posted by mrAshley | November 25, 2004 9:58 PM
Posted on November 25, 2004 21:58
pookie, your cussin distribution seems to be going well... i's nothin but The Pride.
Fuck You, the Great British Pound!
(i feel better. looooooaaads better.)
Posted by ayla | November 26, 2004 8:33 AM
Posted on November 26, 2004 08:33